Teaching Your Kids To Lie

The financial planners, Scott and Bethany Palmer, wrote an interesting article on how children may pick up lying from observing their parents’ life experiences. It was found, according to Psychology Today, that most people lie once or twice a day. Other research indicates that men lie more often than women. Curious to find out why men lie more, the National Bureau of Economic Research did a study and found inconsistent parenting to be the cause. Parents lied 14% more in front of their sons rather than their daughters. In a test, parents lied 42% of the time in front of their sons during a coin game involving prizes. It’s not really known why parents lie more in front of their sons unless they are trying to impart more honesty onto their female children.

A child may think deception is ok when the father takes the child to a store, buys something for himself and then tells the child “mom doesn’t have to know about this”. When the child grows older they will often use this tactic on the parent by keeping information from them when they are concerned about repercussions about their actions.

Knowing that your spouse seems to always says “no” to anything you want to purchase or do, have you ever planted your desire as an idea in your child’s mind? The child will plead and beg for that vacation or new dog when all along it is the parent who really wants it. The spouse gives in because it’s coming from the child as an earnest request. You just taught your child how to manipulate others.

The Bible tells us to train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. To train your children you must have a way that you go. Have you chosen a way? Is it the right way?

Relationships Need Forgiveness

A son allegedly killed his millionaire father when his allowance was reduced. In another news article we also read that a mother gave her autistic son a meal, allowed him to watch television, and then killed him with a drug-cocktail. The Bible tells us that family members will be against each other in the end times. Genuine love seems to have little place in our society today. But it is important to assess the primary act in these news articles, which is murder.

When we look at the Ten Commandments we find that murder is in direct opposition to one of God’s laws. The transgression of God’s law will affect the transgressor’s relationship with God. One could almost think of it as the change in relationship that would occur when a parent explicitly tells her child not to do something and they do it. A wrong action prevents an open fellowship between the two individuals. Someone has been wronged and so there is a strain in the relationship. It separates people emotionally.

The question that must be asked is if I’m that bad. Many people consider anything they’ve done against God’s laws to be insignificant and that they are “not that bad”. Some people actually say they are basically a good person. The question is really “Am I guilty of transgression”. Looking at the Ten Commandments we would have to ask these “good people” if they have ever stolen anything, regardless of how insignificant the item. We could also ask if they have always honored their parents in speech and deed from birth. Another question would be if they have ever told a lie or deceived someone. While these cover just a few of the commandments, any affirmative answer would render the person guilty of sin. Sin is defined as a transgression of God’s law and breaks a person’s fellowship with Him.

When a transgression occurs the only way to restore the relationship is with forgiveness. To gain forgiveness the offending person must acknowledge they have done wrong, which implies they will put effort into not doing it again. Then the offending person should ask for forgiveness. This displays a humble attitude.

A parent may ask the child to clean their room or they may be grounded for a period of time, these actions will restore relationship. The Bible tells us with God no amount of good works will ever be payment enough to restore relationship with Him. Through His love for us He has already provided sufficient payment with the death of His Son on the cross. With that payment we are forgiven and relationship is restored. But how many will trust what God says and accept His forgiveness?